I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
