i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Damn victory sex feels great
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
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