The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Randomize