Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Randomize