Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
