dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
