But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Randomize
