Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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