I showed him my bush... on skype.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
