That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
