Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
