Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
