Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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