yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
