Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(540): View more from Virginia

I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.

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(337): View more from Louisiana

My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.

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(+49): View more from Germany

This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.

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(815): View more from Illinois

Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye

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(386): View more from Florida

I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.

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(518): View more from New York

I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.

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(917): View more from New York City

It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth

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