so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
