You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
