if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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