ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
