So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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