for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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