The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
