you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Who died my cat blue again?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I know her cup size but not her name....
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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