franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Also, beer. Big fan.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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