i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
