I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
