A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
My bed smells like the plague
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
