no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
im holly from the hills drunk
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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