# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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