I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
