He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
