Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
