the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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