he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
We need a shit load of segways right now
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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