yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
