that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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