I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
