Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
COCAINE IS GR8
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
