I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
