the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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