He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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