if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
