Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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