If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
