Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
