Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
how does that bad decision feel?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
