exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
home. puking in laundry basket.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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