Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
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