That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Randomize
