I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize