He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
i need some magic done to my vagina
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
