So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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